


what seventeen means

by sepia_cigarettes



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-05
Updated: 2013-08-05
Packaged: 2017-12-22 11:57:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/912935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sepia_cigarettes/pseuds/sepia_cigarettes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seventeen means a lot of things for James. There’s his Apparition licence for a start, and then there’s his new height, and then there’s Teddy’s return from Oceania. That one is definitely the best, but Dominique can go screw herself if she thinks that James is going to confess his undying love any time soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	what seventeen means

Seventeen means a lot of things for James. Three of them are a cut above the rest, the first being his Apparition licence, which he wastes no time in employing, meeting up with a few of his mates for a few pints of firewhiskey and staying out for far too long and shagging Alice into oblivion before stumbling home at five in the morning and waving off his mother’s worried threats to vomit in the nearest bathroom. The second is a little less dramatic, and it is the last of his growing stage, which places him taller than his parents; a good thing, seeing as now they can only hex him if they want to punish him, and both had sworn to him earlier in his life that they would not hex their own child. The third is definitely his favourite: Teddy coming home after an extended nomadic spree in Oceania.

-oOo-

“Gods, look at you now,” Teddy laughs as he engulfed James into a hug, bags knocking into their knees from where Teddy had dropped them. “All grown up now, Jamie.”

It’s meant to be a compliment, but James can only read it as a reminder of how Teddy still sees him as a child, a younger brother with six years stretching between them. So he hugs Teddy tighter as if to say _I’m stronger too, now_ and replies, “Hey.”

Teddy smirks, chucking him under the chin like he always used to, although this time the effect is ruined due to their similar heights, “Damn the new height; I can’t do this properly anymore.”

“That’s a good thing, I assure you,” James comments, and Teddy gives him another squeeze.

“I’m sure it is,” Teddy answers, eyes warm and bright as they stare at James appreciatively, shifting down to his feet and tracking slowly back up with an intensity that makes James’ usually witty tongue feel thick all of a sudden. Then Teddy reaches forward and ruffles his hair before loping off to the kitchen in response to James’ mother’s call, tossing over his shoulder, “Come on.”

There’s steaming hot chocolate in mugs and marshmallows to go with them, and James’ family sit in the lounge with Teddy, listening to him talk about his travels with rapt attention. Teddy has planted himself next to James on the sofa, and every so once in a while he’ll turn to James with a soft fond smile that James has little difficulty returning, even though he feels his insides squirm every time Teddy does so.

Then five o’clock rolls around and it’s just like his parents to invite their _entire fucking family_ over for dinner to celebrate Teddy’s return, so James finds himself tucked into the corner of his house, watching Teddy socialise with the rest of their giant extended family over the top of his glass of firewhiskey. Dominique joins him after a while with her own glass, strawberry blond hair curled around her bare shoulders as her younger brother and Lily crowd around Albus’ scroll, no doubt trying to figure out the current state of Albus’ ridiculous social life. Even James isn’t as addicted to people’s attention as his brother is.

“Greetings, brother mine,” she says smoothly, following James wistful line of sight and shaking her head. “You’re rather pathetic, you know. Why don’t you just tell him?”

James is suddenly very regretful that he got drunk post-O.W.L.s and confessed to his cousin. Instead he answers shortly, “No,” and glares down into the bottom of his glass where the dregs of firewhiskey are chasing each other around and around.

“Shame,” Dominique counters as Teddy hugs Victoire and shakes hands with Nick, her fiancé. “He looks good.”

James glances at her, suspicious. He should have known that his cousin would want to take the conversation somewhere. “Where is this going to, Dom?”

Dominique, who has never been one to wait, jumps straight to the point, “You need to tell him. He’s been staring at you all night.”

“Yeah?” James looks carefully at his glass, trying not to entertain the small flicker of hope in him, because otherwise Dominique will know and she won’t let him hear the end of it.

“Yes,” Dominique hums, lipstick red as she bites her bottom lip thoughtfully. “I think it would do you both a lot of good if you put your big girl panties on and told him.”

“Why must it be me?” James complains and Dominique rolls her eyes, giving him a pat on the shoulder that is half-comforting, half-condescending.

“He’s interested, you idiot. Go and do something before I do it myself,” she frowns.

“No.”

“Gods help us,” Dominique reaches up to brush a hand through his messy hair. “You need to do something, Jamie.”

“Maybe,” James says to appease her, before switching topics. “Are you going to Beauxbatons this term?”

“Only for a month to catch up with the Headmistress,” Dominique swallows a mouthful of firewhiskey, fingernails perfectly manicured as they clutch the glass daintily. “And then I shall be back to gorgeous Hogwarts in time for the pre-N.E.W.T.s study rush.”

“A month?”

“A long time, yes,” Dominique makes a face. “But necessary, seeing as I won’t be returning until the end of the school year.”

“I’ll miss you,” James says honestly, and his cousin smiles at him.

“That’s really very sweet, Jamie.”

“Alright.”

“But still, it’s only four weeks. I’ll be back before you know it.” She pauses, before adding, “And I hope that my return is coupled with the news of you and Teddy finally confessing your affections for each other.”

“Doubtful,” James replies.

“You’re so disappointing,” Dominique complains, finishing her drink and setting it on the nearby bookshelf before leaving with a murmured _I’ll be just a minute_ , hips swishing in her Parisian dress. Such a fashion follower. James sips his drink and blames the warm curl in his stomach on the firewhiskey.

-oOo-

At eleven, Teddy is slightly drunk and leaning on James outside, the cool air a suggestion provided by James once the elder had fallen into his arms—quite literally—ten minutes earlier smelling of perfume and firewhiskey, an unfortunate side-affect of having so many female cousins to hug.

“Feeling better?” James checks, Teddy’s hair soft and silky under James’ cheek. It’s coloured a bright blue, like the plumage of a tropical parrot, and James reaches up to finger the locks tenderly, smiling when Teddy sinks into the touch.

“You’re wonderful,” Teddy says, and James’ smile widens a little, pleased at the comment. “I think I shall charge you with stroking my hair whenever I feel like it.”

“I wouldn’t complain,” James replies and Teddy nods, before pulling away and patting his pockets. He draws out a packet of smokes and his wand, lighting up and taking a slow drag.

“Can I?” James asks, and it’s a simple, silly thing, really, but Teddy still hesitates when James reaches out and it stings a little, especially when Teddy apologises and hands over his cigarette with a murmured _sorry, I keep forgetting that you’re old enough_. “All good,” James shrugs it off and makes sure to smoke properly, to show that he does know how to, even though Teddy would probably be displeased to find out that James has been smoking since he was thirteen.

“How’s school?” Teddy questions, and James nods, handing back the cigarette when Teddy beckons for it.

“It’s good.”

“Not too worried about N.E.W.T.s?” James shakes his head and Teddy loops the hand holding his cigarette around James’ neck, cradling his half-filled glass of firewhiskey in the other, saying, “You’ll be fantastic, I know it.”

To be honest, James hasn’t even thought about the upcoming exams. Sure, the twins have been talking about it, and Alice has made a few remarks about what she wants to do after school, but James has always been lazy when it comes to schooling, and the straight-Es in his report have sufficed in keeping his parents off his case.

“Maybe,” he answers, and that seems to keep Teddy happy enough to leave the subject alone. “Why’d you finish travelling?”

Teddy hides his face in James neck and stays silent for a long time, so long that James wonders if he heard his question. When he does speak, it’s on a totally different tangent to the one that James was on, “Are you drunk, Jamie?”

“Why?” James has had enough firewhiskey that he is a little buzzed, but not enough to be totally gone.

“I might be, a little,” Teddy whispers, and then he pushes his glass into James’ hands. “So you should be responsible and take this from me before I do something bad.”

“Like?”

“Confess my undying love for someone.”

“Who?” James asks, hoping it’s him and heart hammering at the thought of Teddy liking someone else, which is fucking ridiculous, because Teddy isn’t his to own.

Teddy laughs, “I can’t tell you that. Too young for that.”

“Right.” James says shortly, throat tight.

Teddy sighs, “Don’t be mad at me, Jamie.”

“I’m not.”

Teddy nuzzles James’ jaw, “You are.”

“Teddy—”

“I like them a lot though.”

James blinks furiously, “Okay.”

“They’re kind of perfect,” Teddy continues, and James wonders if he’s doing it on purpose.

“Why are you telling me this?” He asks, irritated and on his way to upset and wanting to shut Teddy up.

“Because you’re my best friend,” Teddy explains. “They tell each other things.”

“Right.”

Teddy smiles. Then he yawns. “I’m so tired.”

“You should get to bed,” James takes the glass and downs it in one gulp, relishing the burn.

“I should,” Teddy nods and he straightens, giving James a long, strange look before ruffling James’ hair. “Night, Jamie.”

“Do you love them?” James blurts out before he can stop himself.

Teddy’s smile is very soft, “I think so.”

Possibly not the answer James was looking for, and already the rest of the weekend is looking like a disaster.  Teddy leaves and James stays outside, nursing the now empty glass and his burning cigarette. Albus finds him later, and James refuses to admit that he might have been crying, until Albus wraps him into an embrace and waits out the fresh wave of tears.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“You’re fucking fourteen. You wouldn’t understand heartbreak.” James snaps as best as he can, but it’s kind of ruined by his flushed face and wet cheeks.

Albus stays quiet, “I like someone.”

James presses his fingers to his eyes, trying to quell the tears so he can stop acting like a snivelling Slytherin, like his brother, “Shoot.”

“You won’t like them.”

“I don’t like anyone at the moment,” James points out, even though it’s a total lie and saying it makes James feel like crying again in a very unmanly, un-Gryffindor-ish way.

“No, like, you really won’t like him,” Albus repeats, and James raises a brow, wondering when his brother decided he preferred cock. Not that he can complain, really, seeing as he made up his mind about being queer when he was Albus’ age.

“Him?”

Albus goes bright red, realising his blunder too late, “Don’t tell Mum. Or Dad.”

James snorts at his brother’s naivety, “They won’t hate you for being bent.”

“You don’t know that,” Albus replies.

“Yeah, I do.” James shakes his head. “They found out about me and they were cool with it.”

“Since when…?”

“Last year.” James doesn’t want to dwell on it. “Remember Dom’s party? In the holidays? Uncle Bill found me with another bloke and told Mum and Dad.”

Albus pouts, “Why didn’t you tell me this?”

“Because you’re not my fucking parent,” James answers, pondering the wisdom of sitting in the dark with his brother and having too-intimate conversations with him. “Now tell me who it is already.”

Albus sits in silence for a moment longer, “I don’t think he quite likes me anyway.”

“Who is it?”

“I can’t just—”

“ _Who is it?_ ” James presses and Albus blurts it out.

“Scorpius Malfoy.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.” Then, when Albus goes redder than ever, James’ eyes widen. “Fucking hell, Al.”

“I know, don't tell me,” Albus hides his face in his hands.

James bites his tongue, unsure of how to respond. This is beyond his comprehension, especially considering that the two have spent the majority of their schooling years arguing with each other over the most basic things. He says carefully, “I thought you hated him.”

“I don’t. I never have. Fuck, I’d do anything to _talk_ to him, at least.”

And now it is James who is dragging his brother into his lap and hugging him, “Merlin’s beard, you’re fucked up.” Albus hits him. “Hey!”

“Says you.”

“Leave me out of this.”

Albus quiets, “I think he hates me, though.”

“Enough with the self-deprecating shit,” James says, wanting silence. “It’s tedious.” He doesn’t know if he’s talking to Albus or himself.

-oOo-

Dominique sends him a message via her owl Unique—terrible name for a bloody Scops owl, really, James decides—on Thursday, after James has spent the afternoon getting bludgeoned by stray quaffles. He ignores the stubborn owl’s request for treats, instead tugging off his training jersey and opening the parchment to read the elegant handwriting.

_Please tell me you’ve thought up an intelligent way to tell Teddy you love him,_ it reads. _After all, you’re going home for the weekend, right?_

James looks at it for a long time, then scribbles an answer on the back and sends the owl off. He takes a shower and fails at not thinking of Teddy as he wanks off before joining his housemates and leaving for the Longbottom twins’ party to get roaring drunk. As expected, Dominique’s next letter the next morning when James is nursing a hangover is far from friendly—borderline Howler, really—and James burns it before telling her to leave it alone.

Alice Thomas reads the next one that Dominique sends—despite James’ previous warning—over his shoulder before he chucks it into the fire, tilting her head to the side, “Who’s she on about?”

“None of your business,” James taps her on the nose and she sticks her tongue out as he throws it to the flames.

The next letter says something along the lines of _you’re being pathetic_ , and James realises with a jolt that he’s acting like his bloody younger brother. So he goes home that weekend, promising his cousin to at least do something (if only to get her off his back) about his situation.

Teddy is living with them, it turns out, and he’s up to his elbows in flour, baking with Lily. James’ heart hammers in his throat, and he wants to walk over and kiss Teddy when Teddy looks up at him with the same bright eyes, but he doesn’t.

“You’re back,” Teddy waves, and James spots flour in Teddy’s now-green hair.

“Only been three weeks,” James mutters and Teddy winks at Lily conspiratorially.

“Listen to him. Three weeks at school without us and he’s all grumpy.”

Lily rolls her eyes—James feels like telling her she’s put too much mascara on—and bites into a freshly baked biscuit, “Want one, James?”

“Uh, no, thanks.” James points behind him, glancing at Teddy and noticing the way Teddy’s eyes slide away from him as soon as he realises he’s been caught staring. “I’m going to see Mum.”

It probably wasn’t a good idea to come home, James decides after spending dinnertime watching Teddy practically fellate his fork as he pushes his cock through his fingers. He bites around Teddy’s name when he comes and wishes it was all so much easier.

-oOo-

Dominique catches up with him in the next week, fresh from her time in France and struggling to talk in English again. It’s always been a habit of hers to lapse into French whenever she returns from Beauxbatons Academy, and this time is no different.

“ _Salut,_ _mon ami_ ,” she greets condescendingly, pressing a waxy kiss to his cheek before hooking an arm through his and demanding to be walked to her house; another reminder of how weird James’ family is with the majority of them being sorted into different houses than their parents. Lily and Albus are in Slytherin, after all, and Rose, Louis and Dominique are in Ravenclaw, whereas Hugo and James got stuffed into Gryffindor.

“How was France?” James asks.

“ _Bon_ ,” Dominique nods. “Did you tell Teddy?”

“Of course not.”

Dominique scowls, “Better do it soon, yes? Or I’ll—”

“Bullshit, you won’t,” James glares at her and she stares right back, ever the stubborn git. Sometimes James thinks that she should be in Gryffindor rather than Ravenclaw.

“I will, and you know it,” Dominique threatens, and James realises that they’ve come to a stop outside the Ravenclaw common room. “Very well. _Bonsoir, mon frère_. We’re talking about this tomorrow, okay?”

“Maybe not.”

“Good,” Dominique says regardless of the evasive answer and she raps the knocker, James not bothering to stick around and find out the pending riddle. He was never a straight-O student like his cousins.

The weekend is spent with Dominique, lounging around next to the Black Lake whilst attempting to study for N.E.W.T.s and cursing the strangely-hot Spring. Dominique goes for a swim—and earns even more male attention than usual—before returning almost immediately, complaining of sunburn.

“You pale, white thing,” James teases, rubbing lotion onto her pink shoulders.

“Do be quiet, you,” she retorts, pointing out a mistake in his Arithmancy.

“Bugger,” James starts on a new page, annoyed at his lack of finesse in what is usually his best subject. “I never make mistakes.”

“Things on your mind?” Dominique says knowingly and James gives her a gentle shove towards the water.

“Go and drown, you harpy.”

“And then what would you do with yourself?” Dominique taunts, but she leaves nonetheless and James finds out where he went wrong.

-oOo-

Dominique continues to send him correspondence—even though she’s back at Hogwarts, they still hardly see each other due to their differing subject timetables—and James answers them all with messages along the line of leaving the topic the fuck alone. His cousin has never been one to back down easily, though, and in the end James tells her everything in one very long letter that Unique has a hard time carrying. Poor Scops owl. James finds himself growing fond of the poor thing, although he attributes it to the owl having to be battered in the winds every single day with a heavy message to carry.

_Tell him,_ Dominique writes him one day, and James sighs. He’s one week out from holidays and he’s dreading it, going home and spending two weeks with Teddy and his family. Alice has already talked to him about visiting, but to be honest, the Easter break is just full of chocolate and hot-cross buns and family anyway, so he doubts he’ll be able to get away.

On the Thursday before they’re bound to return home, James, the Longbottom twins, Alice and Dominique all crowd into a corner of The Three Broomsticks and sip butterbeer and firewhiskey as they wait for Mark and Will to show up.

“Can you believe we’re one term from N.E.W.T.s?” Lorcan asks lazily, letting his brother eat his dinner of beef Wellington.

“Merlin, don’t say that,” Alice moans. “It makes me sad.”

“It’s doing my head in,” Dominique adds, giving James a side-long look and smiling reassuringly when James makes a face in return. “Don’t worry, Jamie,” she pats him on the head. “You’ll be fantastic.”

“Shut up, Dom.”

“Touchy,” his cousin sniffs and she brushes her strawberry-blond hair over one shoulder, wrinkling her nose when a nearby muscled Hufflepuff winks at her. “Cute, but not my type.”

“You’re so picky,” Alice chides and Dominique grins at her before sipping her butterbeer.

The twins roll their eyes in turn and Lorcan steals his brother’s drink of firewhiskey, looking at James and asking, “Decided what you want to do after school?”

“Nuh,” James shakes his head.

“Shame,” Lorcan quips. “We’re going to some prestigious Potions Academy.”

“What a bore,” Dominique comments, even though she’s a Ravenclaw and by all means should be interested in the academic wellbeing of her peers.

“Indeed,” Lysander agrees sadly.

James finds himself smiling, “At least one of us won’t be spending the rest of the year wondering what they’re doing with their lives.”

“Two,” Lorcan corrects. “I’m still here, mate.”

“Right, two,” James remembers. “Sorry.”

“You alright there, James?” Lysander queries. “You’ve been distracted for a while now.”

“Define ‘a while’,” James focuses on his mug and doesn’t react when Dominique nudges him gently. He’s not about to tell his entire friend group about his hopeless crush on his older god-brother.

“Two months?”

Yes, because two months ago, Teddy moved back home and proceeded to make the weekends that James managed to work up enough Gryffindor courage to go home a living nightmare with his stupidly-bright eyes and fork-fellating skills and lingering touches and cigarette-sharing and too-tight hugs.

“Ah,” James says, surprised to find his eyes feeling hot and stingy. He blinks twice, closing them and drinking deeply. “I’m just tired.”

“I guess we all are,” Alice says sympathetically, and James remembers why they used to go out, all that time ago in fourth year, because she never really knew the undercurrents of James personality, but she never tried bringing them up. She was just content to be his girlfriend, without any clinginess or ‘don’t you love me’ rubbish that all his mates ran in to all the time.

“Cheer up,” Lorcan nudges James. “Holidays next week, before our term in Hell.”

“Plenty of time to recuperate and prepare,” Lysander nods and James smiles back tightly as Dominique squeezes his hand underneath the table.

-oOo-

The first week of holidays hurt. Teddy is a constant presence, always appearing at inopportune moments to steal James’ food or drink or book or cigarette, and it’s making it hard for James not to heed his cousin’s request of instigating something during the vacation period. Then one day Teddy curls around James on the couch and doesn’t let go, so James is stuck there for a good hour or two whilst trying not to focus on the warmth of Teddy’s body pressed to close to his.

“Tell me about your girlfriend, Jamie,” Teddy says quietly into the crook of James neck.

“What?”

“Lily told me you had a girlfriend,” Teddy answers.

“When?”

“Yesterday, I think.” Teddy shifts, and his leg is really too close to James’ crotch. “Didn’t you want to tell me?”

“You’re twenty-three, Teddy,” James snorts. “I don’t think you’d be particularly interested in hearing about your god-brother’s love life.”

“I’m always interested in anything you have to say,” Teddy sounds hurt.

James sighs, turning his head to look at Teddy, “Why would that be?”

Teddy looks at him carefully, before kissing him, softly, sweetly, slowly. He pulls away after a long moment, “Sorry. Fuck, sorry. Shit.” Then he Apparates suddenly, leaving James confused and disorientated and wondering if the kiss even happened. Albus’ pet snake Dia darts into the room at the loud crack and James leaps onto the kitchen counter.

“Albus, get your fucking snake the fuck out of here,” James shouts, trying not to dwell on the look Teddy gave him after kissing him so suddenly. Still on the same tangent as all the other ones. Like he was too young.

-oOo-

Teddy comes home at dinner and doesn’t meet James’ questing glances, ignoring him until after dessert and then escaping to his room.

James follows as soon as his mother lets him, finding the door locked when he tries it, “Teddy.” No answer. He tries spelling the door open, “Teddy, let me in. We need to talk.”

“No,” Teddy’s voice is thick through the door.

James swallows his frustration, “Please?”

Again, no answer, but the door bolt slides out of place and James enters.

Teddy is on his bed, cradling his head in his hands, “Shut the door, James.”

James does as he’s told, not liking the way Teddy uses his full name.

Teddy looks back and sighs, “Sorry about earlier.”

“Okay,” James says stupidly, praying his Gryffindor courage doesn’t fail him as he sits next to Teddy and tugs on Teddy’s arm. “Don’t. Um, be.”

“I should,” Teddy flexes his hands in the bedspread. “God, you’re just a kid.”

James heart is suddenly in his throat then, beating fast, “What?”

Teddy closes his eyes, breathes deeply like he’s trying to gather some kind of resolve, “You’re _seventeen_ , Jamie. My fucking god-brother. And I kissed you, Merlin. Fuck knows why you’re sitting with me at the moment. You should be freaked out or something.”

James swallows, tongue heavy, “I’m not.”

Then, after deciding that his brain isn’t functioning well enough to tell Teddy what he wants, he leans forward and presses his mouth very deliberately to Teddy’s. Teddy pushes him away instantly, “Jamie, no.”

James blinks, hurt, “Why not?”

“Because you’re confused,” Teddy argues. “And you have every right to be.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t expect you to,” Teddy nods and James _doesn’t get it_. “You’re too young for this.”

“Stop treating me like a child,” James snaps. “I’m seventeen.”

“And you’re kissing your twenty-three-year-old god-brother,” Teddy says. “You have a bloody _girlfriend_ , for Merlin’s sake.”

“I don’t,” James responds, grasping Teddy’s sleeve. “I haven’t had a girlfriend since fifth year.”

Teddy is stubborn, “Regardless, I’m the one who kissed you first.”

“Are you trying to imply that I’m confused?” James asks, because that, that hurts. He thought Teddy knew better.

“I’m not implying,” Teddy narrows his eyes. “You _are_.”

“Don’t say I’m confused, because I’m not,” James says weakly, bravado slipping through his fingers like water.

Teddy gives him a long, appraising look, “You don’t know that.”

“I do,” James argues. “Fucking hell. I’ve—ever since fifth year. And then for you to just, fuck, tell me you fancied someone else one moment and kiss me the next…” James closes his eyes against the cowardly tears, hating himself so much.

“Jamie…”

“Fucking hell. Okay. I get it. I’m too young, or whatever, fine. Great. Okay.”

“Jamie, no—”

James ducks out of Teddy’s reach, “Fuck off, Teddy.”

“I didn’t mean—I don’t—I just don’t want you to…make a mistake or something.”

“Got it. Right.”

“Fuck’s sake,” Teddy snarls, and then he lunges out, grabbing James around the wrists and shoving him unceremoniously onto the bed before looming over him. “What do you want, Jamie? Huh? What do you want me to do? Do you want me to kiss you again? Or am I just a conquest? I like you far too much for your own good and if this is what you want, then we’ll do it, okay? But if you’re just fucking around for the sole purpose of seeing if you can get into your god-brother’s pants, then it ends here. So. What do you want?”

James stares up at him, eyes full of tears borne from anger and humiliation and wishing that the ground would open up and swallow him whole as he says, “ _You_.”

Teddy’s expression softens drastically, one hand slowly slipping from James’ wrist to hover above James’ hip for a moment as he looks intently at James’. He must see something in James’ eyes, because then he presses down firmly and shifts to plant his other hand next to James’ head.

“Gods…okay,” Teddy nods, and then he’s kissing James again, a little less softly and a lot more demanding, and James is struggling to remember a time when he was snogged so thoroughly as Teddy works a hand under James’ head to tilt it and fuck his tongue in better. James is still gathering his scattered wits when Teddy pulls away and rests his forehead on James’ shoulder, muttering, “Fuck, fuck, I can’t believe I’m doing this,” even though his hands are working at getting James’ trousers undone and he’s pressing kisses to James’ throat and James bucks up and bites back a groan at how good it feels. “What do you want to do?” Teddy asks, clearly unsure, and James rolls his hips again, because Teddy can act like a virgin, but James isn’t going to, because he isn’t.

“Everything,” he says immediately and Teddy tenses. “Please don’t say no,” James almost pleads and Teddy kisses him quickly.

“I’m not, I’m just…” James pushes at Teddy to sit up and take his shirt off, fingers fumbling with the button of his jeans. Teddy grabs his wrist, stilling his movements, eyes wide, “Merlin, you’re serious.”

“Of course I’m serious—”

Teddy launches forward and kisses him again, finishing undoing James’ jeans himself, “Merlin, Merlin, Merlin. Are you sure?”

He doesn't let James answer anyway, too busy licking every inch of James’ mouth as his hands tug James’ jeans off. When he finally lets James breathe, it’s to pull off his own shirt, and James feels a little lost, hands where Teddy had pinned them either side of his head, and he’s flushed and hard as ever.

“Oh gods, look at you,” Teddy breathes, and James’ eyes slide shut in embarrassment. “James, Jamie,” Teddy is whispering, mouth moving over James’ face. “ _Fuck_ , look at me? Jamie?” James opens his eyes to see Teddy hovering above him, nudging their noses together. He arches up, pressing their mouths against one another briefly before breaking away as Teddy’s hands slip over James’ arse and guides them to oscillate against his gently, hesitantly. “Fuck,” Teddy mutters and ducks down and moves his mouth against James’. “Merlin, you’re really—fucking hell, are you sure you want this? We can stop—”

“Please don’t,” James mumbles, mouth tingling all over as Teddy’s fingers circle his cock. “Oh, _Godric_.”

He’s dreamt about this for far too long. Teddy kisses him repeatedly, fingers so right around James’ cock as he strokes, “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“You should,” James says breathlessly, pushing up and whimpering.

“Gods, Jamie,” Teddy says quietly, pressing James’ legs wider so he can lie between them. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“You’re not even doing anything,” James complains, trying to get some friction now that Teddy has stopped stroking his cock, the older male hooking James’ knees over his shoulders and pressing a tender kiss to James’ thigh.

“Fine,” Teddy says with a final tone in his voice, and James should have chosen his words better, because Teddy lunges forward and _swallows_ his cock whole and _fuck_.

A loud sound tears its way out of James’ throat and he fists his hands in his hair, straining upward and nearly sobbing when he meets Teddy’s hands and mouth instead, holding him down and sucking his cock with wet, needy sounds. James’ mouth forms around a sentence that he has no energy to voice, and fuck, Teddy is still there, drawing up and lapping at the head of James’ cock repeatedly until James growls and mutters something like _if you don’t continue I’ll rip your balls off_ and then he chuckles and goes down on him again, and shit, James can see the outline of his cock pressing against Teddy’s cheek. Teddy chooses that moment to glare at James, eyes hot and molten and filled with lust and James has no control over anything after that, bucking up in short bursts and meeting Teddy’s movements until he _screams_ and comes, feeling like passing out when Teddy doesn’t pull away and instead stays with his mouth tight around him, swallowing everything.

“I…” James gasps, trying to regain his mind as Teddy kisses the underside of his spent cock before shifting up to suckle James’ jaw. “ _Fuck_ ,” he finishes helplessly instead.

Teddy dips down to press their lips together very softly, “Jamie, Jamie, Jamie. What am I ever going to do with you?”

James doesn’t even think about the repercussions, “Fuck me.”

James feels rather than hears Teddy’s sharp intake of breath against his neck and he grins a little, wrapping his arms around Teddy’s neck to keep him there. Then Teddy grips James’ hips tightly, “You realise what you’re asking for, right?”

“Fuck me, Teddy,” James repeats and Teddy tightens his hold on him, face buried in James’ neck.

“Gods,” Teddy says brokenly, hips stuttering into James for a brief moment before he leans up and rummages around on his nightstand. “Sure?” He asks, even though he’s found his wand and is pressing the pad of his fingers into James’ mouth.

“Yes.”

Teddy kisses him messily, “Really? Because we don’t have to. We can leave it at this or something.”

“Teddy,” James stops him. “Please?”

Teddy’s face crumples into a sort of fond _I’d do anything for you_ , and James blinks heavily, wondering if it’s normal to be this caught up in emotions. Teddy answers, “Yeah, yeah, sure, anything,” and James nods and licks Teddy’s fingers dutifully, surprised at the sudden wetness as Teddy’s wand comes into contact with his arse.

And then Teddy is entering him, his cock long and thick as it presses in, filling him up, and James’ is crying again, overwhelmed at all the sensations as Teddy begins to thrust, long, slow ones at first before sharpening to quick snaps of his hips, and he’s talking the entire time, murmuring _so tight_ and _you’re perfect_ and _gods, keep looking at me like that and I’ll never let you go_ and James is wrung out with emotion when he finally finishes again, thick ropes of come striping over Teddy’s chest as the older male comes with a bitten-off cry into James’ neck.

“Okay?” Teddy checks and James nods heavily, mewling when Teddy scoops him up in his arms and kisses and kisses and kisses him until their mouths are beyond swollen and James is too tired to care.

-oOo-

“So you pulled finger,” Dominique comments, stirring sugar into her coffee with a lazy elegance that only a girl of Veela blood can pull off.

James shrugs, nods, and then promptly decides not to give a damn, “I suppose.”

“Well, you look happier,” Dominique counters, taking a dainty sip of her coffee and smiling. “He makes you happy, does he not?”

“Yeah,” James answers, meeting her gaze. “What about you, Dom? Any crazy tales of people who have taken your heart that you want to tell me about?”

“I think not,” Dominique says with a moue of distaste. “I’m not as pathetic as you are.”

“I’m a Gryffindor,” James says defensively.

“More a Slytherin like Albus, I should think,” Dominique disagrees.

“That’s insulting,” James says truthfully and Dominique lifts her shoulders.

“Take it as you will. But I’m surprised that your lion genes of bravery didn’t kick in and prompt you to tell him straight away.”

“Shut up, Dom.”

Dominique sighs and pats her cheek, “You have yet to thank me, as well. I guess I’m asking too much of a Potter.”

James kisses her—very wetly—on the cheek, “You can’t complain when you’re a Weasley.”

“I suppose not,” Dominique says with a secretive smirk.

James eyes her red lipstick and carefully-applied mascara, “You should give Lily make-up lessons. She looks like a tart most days.”

“Don’t be mean,” Dominique chides, but the shaking of her head gives away her true opinion.

“She does!”

“All the same,” Dominique sniffs. “You’re far too brash for her. Merlin knows how she puts up with you.”

“She has Teddy,” James says weakly.

“When he isn’t wrapped up in you, yes,” Dominique teases and James flushes bright red.

“Do shut up, Dom.”

 

[the end]


End file.
